Is it a boy or a girl? WHAT?!?!?! You’re not finding out?!?!?!?

Yep, we’re not finding out. And it’s really not that bad. When Elizabeth and I first started planning for children, she was adamant that we not find out. Most people find that really hard to believe; the type A planner, organizer, and all around Mary Poppins of a wife did not want to know the sex. I realized pretty quickly that her reasoning was sound. She was going to happy for a healthy baby and the sex should not be an issue, unfortunately it took me a while to come around. I wanted to know if we’re having a boy because I had a list of things to prepare and if it was a girl, I had a different list to prepare.

What are those lists you ask? Well if it’s a boy, I had to buy lots of Kentucky Wildcat gear for him to wear and teach him the fight song (and sadly NCAA rules). There would be many long hours of diagramming the Tampa 2 defense, disguised blitzes, spread offense, and explaining how awful the BCS is. (all of those are football terms for the ladies reading) Plus with a boy, I don’t have to save as much money. No multiple prom dresses or makeup to buy, boy drama to deal with, and of course the eventual fairytale wedding which she would want me to pay for, if she’s anything like her mother. The big issue with a daughter is other girls her age. My sister in her infinite wisdom said God gave her 2 boys because he knew she wouldn’t be able to handle the girl drama. You see, there is no crueler creature on this planet than a pack of teenage girls preying on one girl. With all that I saw in high school, I don’t want a daughter to experience that. Got you nodding you head didn’t I? Told you boys are easier.

If I have a daughter my list to prepare will be buying a new shotgun and hiring private investigators to follow her in high school and college. I know that sounds crazy and I’m kind of kidding (not about the shotgun), but the world out there is very dangerous for any daughter of mine because there are boys. While not all boys are bad, I fear she’ll bring home one like me when I was 21 or 22. Those were not good years and I was not a model boyfriend or even model person for that matter. If she brings home a guy like me, Daddy will not be a happy camper.

So as you can see, why find out? Everything listed above is not even close to being really that important. In fact, the major reason people find out is materialistic. The sex is only important for buying “stuff” and most of that stuff is a waste of money. Sure, when you don’t know the sex it’s difficult to find clothes that are gender neutral. But the kids grow so fast, half of the clothes bought before they’re born never get worn.

So instead of buying all this pink or blue “stuff” for the baby and having millions of clothes that won’t see the light of day, we just pray for a healthy child. The sex won’t matter to us either way, just different paths will be taken with each sex, but we’ll be ready. For those wondering what I think it will be, I say it’s a girl. My wife swears we’re having a boy. We both hope the other one of us is right! First and probably the last time for that.

G.O.T. (guys only tip) I was finally swayed by a co-worker of mine to not find out the sex. He helped me realize that if you don’t know the sex of the baby, everyone ends up buying you practical items you need instead of lots of baby outfits the child will never wear. We guys like to watch the bank account and shopping bags coming in the doors, so nothing should get us more pumped to not find out than that. How great would it be if you got all your big items from family members and friends going in together on stuff rather than everyone bringing 5 outfits to the shower? After all the baby showers so far, I think we have a total of 10 outfits hanging in the closet. But we’ve been getting lots of good practical items that we actually registered for! Thank you!

One more thing to note. I’ve been told by those who didn’t find out that the delivery room is a thousand times more exciting when the sex is unknown. Then you get to go out and announce to everyone in the waiting room what it is! This is right of passage for every father since the dawn of time, only in the last 50 years has this ritual been removed from the experience. Wouldn’t you rather do it the old fashioned way?

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